Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow.

It's hard to even start this blog post, as I'm still teary and still overwhelmed with all that has transpired over the last month or so.

Most of you would know/remember some of our journey the last 6 years. Buying our first home, only to lose it to a short sale 1.5 years later when Tyler was laid-off and I was unexpectedly let go from my job. This started a very long recovery process with our credit and we spent the last 5 years renting in Texas and here in KC. Which - of course - has it's perks. You're not responsible (theoretically, ha) for any major problems with rentals, but the downside is of course, that you're basically throwing money away each month and never feeling completely settled.

So, in April of 2013, we put an offer in on a house and were so excited when it was accepted. But then in June, once again, our dreams fell through. For unknown reasons that we still don't know to this day, but yet believe that HIS plan is perfect. HIS plan, friends... not our own.

I always had a hard time 'claiming' Kansas City as home because, when you rent, you're really not tied down anywhere. When you don't have a home to sell, you can essentially pick up and move at any given moment.

It was right around this time last year, when I heard so clearly from the Lord that we were going to be Kansas City'ians, not Iowans, like I always thought. When I finally realized that THIS PLACE (earth) is not our home, it changed everything. It brought a sense of contentment that I'll never understand about our circumstances. Man, we were sooooo close to the interstate, the school district wasn't great, and that rental was a big chunk of junk, honestly. But something transformed in my heart and mind when I began longing for more of heaven, and less of earth. The deepest sense of contentment that came straight from HIM brought us so much peace and joy in the mundane and disappointments of what had happened in the previous 6 years.

It was in August of this year when we started talking with a realtor, and the first sentence of our email to him read: "We really need a Realtor who is ok with us taking a year to find a place, and being patient while we wait to find the right home. We're not in ANY hurry to buy." He was the perfect Christian guy for us, as he never pressured us to go see anything. He also had eyes of steel for 'troubled' homes and told us up front that he'd never let us buy anything that he wouldn't let his daughter buy. Perfect.

In September we looked at a few houses and even made an offer on two separate homes that we thought would be the right fit. The Lord clearly slammed those doors shut, and while we were temporarily discouraged, we had to trust that the right one would come at the right time.

September 30th we made an offer on a home that had just been listed that day. I really had my heart set on a traditional 2 story layout, instead of a split like we so commonly see in this area. Also on my wishlist: a cul-de-sac, plenty of living space, a good layout for entertaining, and a good school district. This one had ALL my wishes, plus more. Before we put an offer in, we found out that there were 4 other offers on the table - the first day it was on the market! We almost backed out without even making an offer, afraid of disappointment, but decided to just give them our best. I remember going to bed that night and listening to Tyler pray "Lord, would YOUR will be done, and not our own." We knew our offer was less than others, but also trusted in HIS big and perfect plan.

The following day, by a complete act of God, the sellers actually chose us. We later found out that they are also believers, and had raised their 2 boys in this home from the day it was built. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say this wasn't a coincidence.

:)

And so it all began... selling of junk, packing, and moving. And on November 4th, we became homeowners again.

Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow. 

Our move went so smooth thanks to so many friends and family that came and just loved us so well over the week and weekend. If you could only see the tears dripping out of my eyes as I type this ....

November 6th we were able to move in to our new home, and our first order of business was to dedicate this place back to HIM.

It's not ours, it's yours, Jesus.
Have your way here.
Use us in this place, in this neighborhood, for your kingdom.

Holy Spirit... you are welcome here. Come flood this place and fill the atmosphere. Your glory, God, is what our hearts long for... to be overcome by your presence, Lord. 

Even to this day, it's hard to explain the way I feel.

I'm just so grateful.

For a transition with Jaxon's school that went smoother than I could have dreamed. For amazing neighbors that have welcomed us with open arms. For the location - smack dab in the middle of our friends, church, and Tyler's work.

And really, just for this home. Not with earthly "it's so beautiful and I'm obsessed" materialistic eyes, but rather with this overwhelming sense of gratitude for HIS goodness and faithfulness to us. We feel so undeserving, yet grateful.

We're so excited to see this next chapter of our lives unfold. And one of the coolest things that  recently happened... our sellers actually came over the day after we moved in to meet us. (!!!) When we were talking, they told us they prayed for us in the garage as they were leaving, that we would have more happy days than sad days in this home.

Man, what a priceless gift we've been blessed with. From Him and Him alone.

Latest and greatest.

(image via meg)

One of those quotes that makes me uncomfortable even reading it, yes?

We are still living in our rental and there's multiple times a week that I convince myself that it won't be this way for much longer, and something big (and hopefully "better") is about to happen.

But then I read a quote like this and wonder if my character, my attitude, the things that are important to me are what is changing, instead of our situation.  Maybe we WILL be in this rental, living paycheck to paycheck, for much much much longer.  Maybe my heart and priorities are being transformed "in the bad", before we can move on to "the good".

Because of our limited budget and the highhhh price of Johnson County, our options to move are...impossible...limited.  The one time we went to look at another place, we came home and thanked the good Lord for this big beautiful super spacious bright rental that we currently have... ha...haaa...haaaa.  (but really!)

I will tell you, what's really stretching me the most about living here, is dealing with the showings.  I may not have even mentioned it here... when we gave our 30-day notice to our landlord that we were moving out, he put this place on the market.  Another one of those "whyyyyy did it happen this way" situations.  However, it is WAY overpriced, so it won't sell any time soon... but now we deal with showings multiple times a week.  And let's talk about how much fun it is to keep my house in "show ready" condition, and find places to go for hours at a time during showings, with 2 boys and a dog.  :)

We can't buy again until next June (10 months away), so the thought of moving now and signing a 12 month lease somewhere doesn't seem right.  However, because the house IS on the market, we may not have a choice if the right offer is made to our landlord.

A lot of days, I'm ok.  I trust that The Lord already has this entire situation worked out (for our good!) but I'd be lying to you if I said that some days, I don't feel suffocated with worry and trying to figure it all out on my own.  I'm ready for this "waiting period" to be over.

It's easy to praise when things are going our way... when we're living a comfortable life.
But in these moments of loneliness, worry, and questioning...
It's not as easy.
But if it's going to bring me closer to God... bring my heart closer in tune with His...
I'll go through it time and time again.

So, with much hesitation, I ask...
Bring me the uncomfortable, Lord.
(in small doses, please and thank you.)

How quickly things can change.

It's been 2 months since our offer got accepted on Raintree Dr.

2 months spent dreaming about the boys growing up there.
2 months spent thinking about the fun parties we'd have in the beautiful back yard.
2 months spent decorating in my head, making plans, and selling our current furniture to buy different stuff.
2 months looking forward to not being renters anymore.

I started getting nervous a couple weeks ago when our lender starting asking more and more questions about our first home, that we lost to a short sale.  They wanted statements written, documentation of different events, and more and more paperwork to sign and return.  I started wondering why they didn't ask these questions during our pre-approval, instead of now, just weeks before closing.

Turns out my suspicions were right, when Friday afternoon the lender called with a teary voice and told us that our financing was no longer available without coming up with an additional $11,000.  She had taken our case to the National Board of Underwriting, and they agreed to let us buy, only if we could provide the additional funds.

You know how this ends, don't you?  We obviously don't have an extra $11,000 to put down (on top of what we were already planning on spending), so we are no longer buying this house that we thought was ours for over 2 months.

I cried.  I sobbed.  I lost my breath crying so hard.  Every time I picked up my phone and had to explain the situation to another person, I lived through the emotional roller coaster again. We already had the utilities scheduled to be shut off, had already given our notice at our rental (that is now for sale), and really had the countdown started for how many more days we had to accept those living conditions.  Mold and mud on the floor, water that did not run outside, and the list continues.  We couldn't wait to move out and have a place to call our own... and suddenly everything we thought was happening had spun out of control.

The next couple days were spent crying some more.  Luckily, we were in Iowa at the time, so we spent this time out on the river canoeing which was SO good and healing for me.  Tyler continued to hide my phone because all it did was upset me.  Disconnecting from reality was helpful.

Sunday morning, Tyler's family all gathered in the living room for live church via the internet, and of course, tears streamed down my face through the majority of it.  A sermon on trusting and faith... two things I had nearly lost at this point.  Why the Lord allowed us to get SO FAR into this house buying experience (2 weeks from moving), only to learn we won't be able to buy for another 1-2 years is something we may never understand, but faith is believing that The Lord is going to do what he says he's going to do... so obviously my faith is being tested.

At this point, it had been almost 48 hours since we got the news, and I was still so upset.  My eyes were bloodshot and nearly swollen shut, and suddenly as Tyler wrapped his big loving arms around me, I really started to question and wonder what the REAL reason I was so upset was.  Yeah, it's a house that we loved and dreamed about and called our own, but what was really going on?

Realizing that I was searching for happiness IN a house has been healing for me.  Realizing that deep down I am searching for many things... deep friendship, a sense of community, happiness... and temporarily finding it in a house was the real reason for my broken heart.  I love to decorate, paint, and the idea of turning this place into our home was so exciting for me.  I really had something to look forward to, and this was something that had distracted me from this "searching" that I am doing.

Maybe The Lord was protecting me from the disappointment I would have felt after moving in and still being unhappy deep down.  Maybe The Lord is protecting us from a job loss.  Maybe He has bigger and better plans for us, which a house could have stopped us from chasing after.

We don't know the reason.  There's a possibility that we won't ever know the reason.  But Faith?  It's believing that The Lord is going to do what he says he's going to do.

He has promised to supply every need we have. (Philippians 4:19)
He has also promised that all things work together for good to those who love and serve Him faithfully.  (Romans 8:28)

So, we wait.  We anticipate the good things The Lord has in store for us.  We look forward to Him fulfilling his promises to us.

And I would appreciate your prayers as I search for contentment in HIM and HIM ALONE.  And for peace.  Staying in our rental has not been easy for me, but I trust there's a reason for it and hope to find peace in this temporary solution.

I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—

plans to take care of you, not abandon you, 

plans to give you the future you hope for.

Jeremiah 29:11 (MSG)

OUR house!

Perfect timing, following my recent whiney post, huh?  :)

Yesterday we found out that the seller accepted our offer on the perfect, perfect, home for us.

Would you believe me if I told you it met all of my "wants" and "must-haves"?

An open floor plan for entertaining
A fenced backyard
4 bedrooms (I was SO picky about this one... I want my guests comfortable!)
2 separate living areas ... a "family room" versus the more formal living room
Great school district
Good location... far far far from interstate traffic!

Yes, we were picky... and it paid off.  I could cry writing this!  I am so excited to be a homeowner again!

We won't have possession until the end of June, unless the seller finds a new home for themselves quicker than they expect, but I am totally ok with that!  I will wait as long as needed for this place.  800 feet from the walking/bike trails, a couple blocks from the elementary school, and within walking distance to a pool and park.

Yesterday was just one of those days that as it came to a close, I couldn't stop reflecting on.  For family that came last night to celebrate with us (and brought cake pops and lasagna!), for laughter, for the memories that we'll create there, and for The Lord's BIG dreams for us that are far better than I could imagine.

Thank you, Jesus, for your incredible blessings on our lives.  I am so thankful.

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts... and be thankful.

Colossians 3:15

I'm ready.

House shopping sounds so fun, doesn't it?

Browsing through other peoples homes, seeing whats out there, looking at their decorations and imagining your stuff in its place, picturing your family at the kitchen table or in the back yard playing... it all sounds so fun.

Until you start.  And then it isn't that fun at all.

We've been house shopping for over 3 months now and let me tell you how over it I am.

I'm over the disagreements between my husband and I.  He loves one house, I can't stand the layout.  I love another house, he doesn't the potential.
I'm over the disappointment after being turned down by a seller, or by getting my hopes up on the way to the house, only to find a complete dump.
I'm over the stress of it all.
But most of all... I'm over this rental house.

Jaxon is over it too.

I'm ready to have a place to call our own... OUR neighborhood, OUR street, OUR school district, OUR yard.  A place where I can finally feel settled, somewhere to decorate and make changes to without feeling like it's a waste of money.

As ready as I feel, I also am trying to find peace in The Lord's plans... HE knows way better than I do!  There's a reason we haven't found that house yet, and I am (deep breath) trying to rest in His perfect timing.

Pray for us, if you think of it!  I can't wait until I have some happy news to share, hopefully sooner than later.

:)

Living Room updates.

Our Living Room is the #1 thing I wish I could change about our home, because it's tiny.  I mean, tiny.

I love to entertain, host friends/small group, and envision my entire family hanging out there... and while some of that does happen regardless, it makes for some tight space.  Nothing like bonding with the person next to you practically sitting in your lap.

Anyway, here it is in all it's small glory!

This chair was a Christmas gift to myself... from my hubby... you know how that goes :)

And yes, the rug needs flattened out, I know.  If you have any suggestions on how to make that happen (I've tried heavy books), I'm all ears. 

Won this in a blog giveaway... love love love! 

This wall was updated with new frames and our family picture on a canvas.  And of course, now looking at a picture I can see a few things crooked.  Oh well. 

(see the old version of this wall here) 

 I was looking for a new smaller side table and Craigslist came through for me once again... it was pretty dinged up but with some elbow grease and a can of spray paint she's as good as new.  

 This rug was found all crumpled up in the corner of Target... I had no idea what it looked like OR how big it was and knew it would need work to get the wrinkles out, but I couldn't pass up the $35 price tag, especially when the original price was closer to $200.

I do love how much natural light floods this room.  Even on overcast days, I don't need the lamps on... for that, I am thankful!  Bright rooms keep me happy.

It's definitely nothing fancy, but I really wanted this to be a space where people can come in, kick their shoes off, and just stay a while.  Hopefully that continues to happen.  :) 

Preparing for Fall.

It's no secret that Fall is, by far, my favorite season.

I love cardigans and sweatshirts.  I love the cool, crisp, sunny weather.  The beautiful changing colors of the trees, pumpkin flavored everything, and BOOTS!  How I could forget, I love boots season.

Saturday morning Tyler had to work, and instead of pouting and feeling sorry for myself I decided to try and spruce up my front door.  One of the many things that this house needs is a face lift on the outside, so being the happy little renter I am, I decided to channel my inner green thumb and go on a Mum hunt.

I stopped at a couple different places to look, but wasn't thrilled with any of the options.  The colors were a little dull, and they almost looked like they were on their last leg.

And that's when I saw it.  A little parking lot farmers market.  Big, gorgeous, full mums.  And the $20 price tag was too good to be true.

Otherwise our weekend was pretty quiet.  I had a photo shoot on Saturday night with Molly, a sweet blogging friend of mine that I've "known" for years, but finally met.  Her boys reminded me so much of my own, that instead of hiding out at a coffee shop after the photo shoot like originally planned, I couldn't wait to get home and hug them.  Thank you Molly for blessing me in ways you don't even know!

Sunday was a pretty low-key day... I started off with a 3 mile run in my fastest time yet!  We went out for lunch and actually enjoyed it, ran errands in peace, and my husband even treated me to a pedicure.  The sound of football in the background during the afternoon screams Sunday to me, and I love it.

But, back to reality...
time to clean the house
bake Pumpkin Brownies for small group tonight
bake chocolate chip cookies for my hubby who requested them
...and light a Fall candle.

Yes, I love this season indeed.

The basement.

We had a productive weekend, getting a lot done around the house.  I keep calling it "project like-my-house-better", and I think it's working.

Anyway, a few updated pictures of our basement / play room / family room... I desperately wish I had "before" pictures, but I don't, so just bare with me!

The alphabet wall was moved from the other side of the room, I like it SO much better here.

We moved most of the toys to the smaller section of the basement, and then put the new (to us) couches in the larger area.

If this looks familiar, it's probably because I copied the idea from Kristal.  This wall used to host the ABC's, so I also needed something that would cover up the many holes as well as display the boys masterpieces in a tasteful (and cheap!) way.

And one of my favorite things... extra toy storage!

All in all, I'm happy with this space.  The couches have made a huge difference in how much time we spend down here, which of course translates into how much time the boys play down here as well, since they love to be where we are. Once I get some curtains up, I think I'll finally be finished with it.

Preach it.

I was walking through the Target clearance aisle the other day, when I spotted this beauty.

I started feeling like it was preaching right to me as I begin to follow my dream, so it now hangs on my wall.

My original intention for this space wasn't necessarily a gallery wall, but as I keep adding things to it, I'm starting to realize it may end up that way.  I hope to add a family picture soon.

So I guess I'm curious... are you doing what you love?  If not, what's holding you back?

Master Bedroom.

I am head-over-heels-in-love with our new Master Bedroom.  Doing the math, we realized it's been 6 years since we have gotten new bedding + decor for our room, so as you can imagine, we were way overdue.

Of course, the beloved before's...

And here's the completed room...

I saved my extra income (from babysitting) for about 4 months to pull it off... here's the breakdown:

Bedding (Target): $100

Sheets (BB&B): $60

Throw pillows (Target): $45

Lamp shade (Pottery Barn, from Craigslist): $20

Mirrors (Hobby Lobby + Target): $80

Curtains (Target): $30

Paint (Home Depot): $25

Total: $360

Again, we haven't had new bedding or new decor for 6 years...

so I am pretty happy with the total spent, all things considered.  :)

I keep walking in the room and wanting to just stay put... it is so comfy & cozy.

Last night we hung out in there for over an hour with the boys just talking and playing...

love! 

If you have any questions, let me know!