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(image via meg)

One of those quotes that makes me uncomfortable even reading it, yes?

We are still living in our rental and there's multiple times a week that I convince myself that it won't be this way for much longer, and something big (and hopefully "better") is about to happen.

But then I read a quote like this and wonder if my character, my attitude, the things that are important to me are what is changing, instead of our situation.  Maybe we WILL be in this rental, living paycheck to paycheck, for much much much longer.  Maybe my heart and priorities are being transformed "in the bad", before we can move on to "the good".

Because of our limited budget and the highhhh price of Johnson County, our options to move are...impossible...limited.  The one time we went to look at another place, we came home and thanked the good Lord for this big beautiful super spacious bright rental that we currently have... ha...haaa...haaaa.  (but really!)

I will tell you, what's really stretching me the most about living here, is dealing with the showings.  I may not have even mentioned it here... when we gave our 30-day notice to our landlord that we were moving out, he put this place on the market.  Another one of those "whyyyyy did it happen this way" situations.  However, it is WAY overpriced, so it won't sell any time soon... but now we deal with showings multiple times a week.  And let's talk about how much fun it is to keep my house in "show ready" condition, and find places to go for hours at a time during showings, with 2 boys and a dog.  :)

We can't buy again until next June (10 months away), so the thought of moving now and signing a 12 month lease somewhere doesn't seem right.  However, because the house IS on the market, we may not have a choice if the right offer is made to our landlord.

A lot of days, I'm ok.  I trust that The Lord already has this entire situation worked out (for our good!) but I'd be lying to you if I said that some days, I don't feel suffocated with worry and trying to figure it all out on my own.  I'm ready for this "waiting period" to be over.

It's easy to praise when things are going our way... when we're living a comfortable life.
But in these moments of loneliness, worry, and questioning...
It's not as easy.
But if it's going to bring me closer to God... bring my heart closer in tune with His...
I'll go through it time and time again.

So, with much hesitation, I ask...
Bring me the uncomfortable, Lord.
(in small doses, please and thank you.)