2015.

I feel like there's a lot of 'pressure' to pick the right word - or phrase - for an entire year.

One word to focus on... to strive for... to remind yourself of.

I've spent the last 19(ish) days praying and seeking the Lord for our upcoming year, anticipating some really great things that may happen, and battling the fear that can take over as I wonder about the unknowns. There's bound to be some hurt... bound to be some joy... and in everything, I want to continue to press into HIM knowing that He is good.

Listening to Spotify while cooking dinner a couple days ago, the song "It Is Well" [by Bethel] came on and suddenly hot tears were streaming down my cheeks. Which got me thinking about the old hymn:

"When peace, like a river, attendeth my way..." [Isaiah 66:12]

"When sorrows like sea billows roll..." [Psalm 42:7]

"WHATEVER my lot, thou has taught me to say... 

It is well, It is well, with my soul."
[James 1:2-4 and Philippians 4:6-7]

May that ring true in my heart and life for 2015.

WHATEVER my lot ... in good and bad ... WHATEVER may come.

It is well, It is well, with my soul.

Tidbits.

I'm in a major blogging rut, so here's my go-to post... a mishmash of what's going on!

I am praying for my heart through this Christmas season, that the GOOD NEWS of why we celebrate would never turn into OLD news.  I want it to be on the forefront of my mind constantly, not focusing on parties, or finances, or all of the to-do's... but rather be driven by why we are celebrating.  Already I have found myself feeling suffocated by the gifts to buy and the traditions that I should have started with the boys (and haven't yet), and I can't let it be that way.  I want this to be the best Christmas season, for all the right reasons.  

Next time you're in Target and you see a frazzled Mom with a screeeaming 3.5 year old and 2 year old, would you say a prayer for her instead of staring and judging why she can't keep her kids under control?  I'm so sick of the side stares I get from people.  I'm sure it's easy to forget what it's like to have young kids, but as an exhausted Mom, I can tell you that your stares are not helping.  Neither are your "my kids will never do that" thoughts.  Just say a prayer for her next time, please? 

And on that note, I am extremely thankful for naps.  Another rough day around these parts, and I needed a breather... almost as much as he needed some sleep. 

Oh, and this cute boy.  He is well into toddlerhood with his favorite phrase being NO!  I think my Mom almost cried last weekend when I sent her precious Cohen to his room.  He's SO cute and ornery and I'm beaming with joy at his expanding vocabulary.

So, one of the most exciting things is my newest addition to my photography business... a 27" iMac!  Oh heavens, what a blessing this was.  A lady posted on our KC Photographers board advertising it, and when I questioned why the price was SO low she told me her Dad owned a cancer clinic that just shut down (because he had passed away), and all these computers needed sold.  She wasn't in it for the money or profit, and it was one of those "too good to pass up" deals.  Especially with AppleCare warranty until next Fall, I feel so grateful.  And dang, editing and looking at pictures is so much fun.  :) 

Christmas jammies = my favorite.  I love lazy mornings at home!

My Dad and I (and Sammy the dog) went on a 2 mile run on Saturday while they were here visiting.  It's the first time I've ran since our race, and it felt great to be back out there.  I've still been really consistent about going to the gym 2-4 times a week (usually going to boxing/TRX or cardio/weights), and to date have lost 39.8 pounds.  Now I need to shift my focus from losing, to maintaining.  It's hard to allow myself those extra couple hundred calories when all I've known for the last 7 months is those are BAD!

I feel like my struggle is finding a happy balance between losing and gaining.  I'm either one or the other, and haven't ever really been able to maintain, so I'm praying this time is different!  I really love how healthy I feel overall, so I hope I won't ever forget that.  

And now, I need a new wardrobe.  And this is not me bragging.  I'm actually bummed about this, because the clothes that are hanging in my closet are ones I still really like.  

The other thing that has taken up a bunch of my time recently, is that I am the new Women's Ministry leader at our church!  The Lord really orchestrated this leadership change in an amazing way, and I am thrilled to pieces to be serving somewhere that I am so passionate about... women and moms.  I have huge dreams for this ministry, and I am just continuing to pray that I can be used in whatever way the Lord sees fit.  I dream of this network of women who are connected and who never feel like they are going through motherhood or just life in general alone.  It's all about the relationships we form. 

One of the biggest dreams I have is to get a Moms group started next spring/summer when our building opens.  Do you remember the Moms group I was apart of in Waco that blessed my socks off?!  Yep, that's it.  That's my dream.  If you are apart of something like this, I'd love to hear all of the things that you guys do to keep my wheels spinning in motion.  And I'd most definitely appreciate the prayer, any time you think of me in this position! 

I love seeing this boys imagination grow.  Yesterday he said to me "Mommy, my Buzz Lightyear is flying to the train store.  Your Buzz is flying to Mommy's favorite red store."  Ha!

He also called me "cheeky" yesterday.  All of you Moms that have Thomas lovers will understand that one.  :) 

10k Race Day!

You'll probably remember that 5 weeks ago I checked one of my New Years Resolutions off my list and ran my first 5k, and this past weekend I doubled that distance running my first 10k!

I probably wouldn't have ever pushed myself to run more than a 5k if it wasn't for my brother, who sent us all an email asking if we were interested in a 10k.  I never ever ever thought this was something I would, or COULD do, so having completed this feels pretty dang good.

Leading up to the race the farthest I had ran was 5 miles, but after I would complete 5 miles, I felt pretty good.  I didn't feel like I was going to die, and I felt like maybe I could go a little farther, so even though I had never ran 6.6 miles, it felt attainable.

Saturday was a PERFECT November day in Kansas, well... minus the 40-50mph winds, but I did mention we are in Kansas didn't I?

One of the biggest differences between this race and our Color Run was the way they got us hyped up to start.  At the Color Run, there was LOUD music pumping, a DJ, a countdown, and so much excitement.  This race we lined up and barely heard a horn, indicating it was time to go.  Way different, but I suppose that's to be expected with a smaller scale race.  A little disappointing, none the less!

We took off and right away I realized I was going to have a hard time keeping up with my brother.  If you want to know one of the differences between a man and womans body, this is it!  He's been training for 5 weeks and his first race was a 10k.  I've been training for... 24? weeks and his endurance amazed me.  I kept up fairly well until mile 3... my Dad needed to take a break to stretch his leg (he had an injury) and mentally I started shutting down.  I told Chad to go on at his faster pace without me, and about 15 seconds later I started kicking myself and started up again.  He wasn't far ahead of me but with earbuds in, he couldn't hear me calling out to him and we lost him for the rest of the race... which hear me out, was totally ok. I was so happy for him that he had the endurance and strength to stay at his faster pace and didn't want to slow him down.

Dad caught up with me at 3.5 miles and we finally hit the turnaround point.  This is where the race got SIGNIFICANTLY easier for me.  I am a huge visual person, and running on a new trail with no idea where the turnaround point was made it really hard for me.  Once we were able to turn around and head back and I could identify the different landmarks telling myself I only had "x" farther to go, I did so much better mentally.


The run back, however, sucked.  It seriously sucked.  We knew we were in trouble when the first 1.5 miles of the trail were ALL downhill, meaning they would be uphill on our finish.  Just as expected, it was not easy, but we pushed through.  We did walk a few times, but my Dad and I are the perfect running partners... he pushed me when I wanted to walk more, and I pushed him to run when he wanted to walk more.


You know how you have good running days and you have bad ones?  This was a horrible one for me.  I kept beating myself up throughout the race trying to figure out what was different or why I was "out of it" that day... the verdict is still out, but most likely it was just in my head.  I had pretty much told myself before the race that it would be a miracle if I could even finish, and I think that's what did it for me.  It's all in the head, people.

A couple of times throughout the run my Dad would sense me shutting down and say something to encourage me.  You guys, he is amazing.  He made me cry 3x on the trail with the things he was saying...
"I am SO proud of you!! You're doing this!!!"
"C'mon Darlin'...we can do this... we ARE doing this!!!"
"CAN YOU BELIEVE WE'RE RUNNING A 10K!!??"
"If someone would have told me 5 years ago that my daughter Megan was going to run a 10k, I would have bet my LIFE SAVINGS that she wouldn't... and look at you now!!"  (haha)

By this point, Chad had already crossed the finish line (6 minutes ahead of us...woo!)

And finally it was our turn... we saw it... the beloved finish line.  Dad said "ok - let's SPRINT!" and we did...

Tears tears tears of joy as I finished... a mix of emotions:: SO stinkin' glad it was over, SO happy, SO proud, SO thankful, and did I mention I was glad it was over?!

I wanted so badly for this race to be over while I was running it, but of course now that it's over we're already looking for our next one.

And that's why they call it runners high.  Good stuff.  :)

He gives power to the weak
    and strength to the powerless.
Even youths will become weak and tired,
    and young men will fall in exhaustion.
But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.
    They will soar high on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary.
    They will walk and not faint.
Isaiah 40:29-31

The Color Run.

I can pretty easily see how running in races is addicting for people, because after this last weekend, I am on the hunt for more runs to participate in!

It was freeeezing cold on Saturday, you guys.  The high for the day was supposed to be 55, but instead it was 41 degrees at 4pm when our race started.  And not a "pretty, sunny" 41 degrees either... it was windy, and looked like it could snow at any second. 

We arrived around 3:15 and found our way into the big long line.  We may or may not have cut in front of some people, but even doing so, we still were in the 12th group to be released.  They let 1,000 runners go every 5 minutes... so there was about 12,000 people in front of us.  Waiting for the countdown to begin before we could run was soooo exciting, my heart was beating out of my chest in excitement, and finally it was time!

We ran through 4 different "color stations" during the race.  Basically, it was about 100 volunteers standing and throwing color at you as you passed by.  If it would have been warmer outside, the color would have stuck better... but between the wind and no sweat, most of our color came off as we were running. 

The race was fairly easy, the only hard part was at the end when we were ready to be done but had a huge hill to run up first.  My Dad was an amazing encouragement throughout the entire thing... at one point when I started feeling "done", he said to me "Darlin' I am SO PROUD OF YOU!", which gave me the push to keep going even harder than I was before.

Such a fun time.

And, in case you were wondering, all of the color came out of my clothing and hair right away.  I was a little bummed... I hoped to have purple hair for at least a week.  :)

Today, I feel pretty stinkin' proud.  I participated in a race that I never thought I would, and I've worked my tail off to get where I am.  It hasn't been easy, and it's been a LONG (and discouraging at times) road, but now that I feel happy & healthy, I can tell you it's been worth it. 

And now I feel challenged to try something more.  3.1 miles seems like a little bit of a breeze, and so I'm trying to talk myself into trying a 10k... 6.2 miles.  My brother/Dad/Sister want to participate in one next month, and I'm pretty hesitant but yet feel like I could do it.

Maybe.  :) 

Also, for anyone wondering, I am now down 29.8 pounds.  3 more pounds to go, and I'll be at my goal weight... yet I still feel like I'm a long ways off.  Maybe it's time for a new goal. 

I think it's smart to always be working towards something.  Keeps you motivated... you know? 

Twenty-twelve.

I've been unusually quiet this week thinking about how to start off another year of blogging.  Do I make it lighthearted or serious?  How do you kick it off?

I want to be sure I'm living intentionally in 2012.  Loving whole-heartily, and extending forgiveness easily.  I want to live by my life verse...

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer."

{Romans 12:12}

Joyful in the hope of His promises for my life.  Patient when trials come along.  Faithful in prayer, learning to commune with him daily and throughout the day, not just during specific prayer times.

On top of this, there's a list of other things I want to do in 2012, which include:

a cleaner house
better time management
work-out 2-3 times a week
run a 5k ... gulp
less complaining, more gentleness
read more


Did you catch that tiny mention of a 5k?  Heaven help me...

What about you?  What do you hope to do/be/accomplish in 2012?  
{Feel free to link back to your post if you have already blogged about this!}