Motivation to keep our home in great condition. {toys everywhere...ahhhhh!} Motivation to stay ahead of cleaning and laundry. Motivation to get in touch with my crafty side and beautify my house. Motivation to continue to work out. Motivation to hang out with friends. Motivation to do anything.
Part of this may be from the lack of sleep I'm getting. You can't even begin to understand the term 'sleep deprivation' until you have a baby. Jaxon has done amazing sleeping through the night since about 14 months, but lately? Up 3-4 times per night! Add this in with Cohen waking up 2-3 times, and you have one very exhausted mama.
The lack of motivation I feel about my house, I think, is due to us renting. Going from being a home-owner to renting is awful. All I can think about each month when I write that rent check is money going down the drain. And why make changes or spend money to fix or beautify this place when it's not even ours, you know?
I look around and see all these craft projects going on in blog world and want to do it myself. But then I don't. I look around blog land and see home improvements taking place and think about how I could do that as well... but why?
To add salt to the wound, I just really miss our families. Really miss them. Like, ache in my gut... that kind of missing them. Staying home for Easter and having no company to come really stinks.
Anyway, if you find my motivation can you tell it that it's mama is really missing it and wants it to come back?
Enough wining for today... someone tell me something nice that's happening in your life to distract me and make me happy for you.
I think sometimes our motivation is drained and apathy sets in when we start comparing our lives to other people's. Cuz i totally understand how daunting the blog world can make things be. I'm right there with you about not having a place that we actually own. While I don't really mind it, and don't feel that it would be responsible to own a house right now, I do wish I could do some super cool things like the blog world. I want to cook like the blog world. Shoot photos like the blog world. Look as good as the blog world. But then i look around and it just seems impossible and pointless.
ReplyDeleteSO anyways, I say all that to tell you that youre not alone, and also to encourage you that you're amazing and you definitely dont have to be like the blog world. Cuz ive loved you before I even knew what a blog was. :)
Ha! I hear ya. This was me for the past year. I had to drag myself to the basement to even pull out the Xmas tree! And we owned that house and I still didn't care.
ReplyDeleteI think it's because even though we weren't renting it I was still thinking of it as temporary - so why waste my time, type of thing. I can completely relate.
I'm sorry you're missing your fam. I can't even imagine. I'll pray that good memories of Easter's past surround you :)
well it could be worse, you could live with your parents. ;) but then I think about how you probably wouldn't mind that right now missing them so much. hm...I guess my joke may not make you smile like it does me!!!
ReplyDeleteI hope you find the energy to beautify. It's always easier said than done but even though you rent, it is still your home and make changes that you can take with you. Make a wall collage, refurnish a piece of furniture (hm, teal or yellow?) go to goodwill and find something wierd and uncanny just to try to find something to do with it. Wow I'm full of good ideas, now I should apply them myself...oh wait, I live with my parents ahhhh!
I am with you too--Justin is out of town for work for two, three, four, or more weeks right now (we won't know for sure how long until he's headed home). I have no motivation for ANYTHING, and I'm just tired. I kind of just want to mope!
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I just wanted to say that I understand, and I hope next week is better!