my little swimmer.

We took Jax to the pool for the first time this weekend. It was a blast! He hated the cold water at first and it took him a long time of sitting on my lap and slowly sticking his feet in (then him screaming), then trying again.. and again.. until he finally got used to it. We are looking forward to a fun-filled summer with our little man!!









He was all tuckered out... fell asleep in my arms in the pool. :)

teething.

jaxon is teething.
he's 13 weeks old. (early bloomer!)
i think he's cried more today than he has in the last 3 months he's been in this world.
it's embarassing having the "crying child" in the room.
i'm exhausted.

happy mothers day!

Before I was a Mom,
I never tripped over toys
or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not
my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom,
I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind
and my thoughts.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom,
I never held down a screaming child
so doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night
watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom,
I never held a sleeping baby just because
I didn't want to put her down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces
when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small
could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom,
I didn't know the feeling of
having my heart outside my body..
I didn't know how special it could feel
to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond
between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small
could make me feel so important and happy.

Before I was a Mom,
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night
every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth,
the joy,
the love,
the heartache,
the wonderment
or the satisfaction of being a Mom...
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much,
before I was a Mom.

my happy baby.

no words.

I can't be the perfect employee, the perfect wife, the perfect mom, the perfect friend, and be a perfect housekeeper all at the same time. I hate not being able to give 100% to anything in my life right now.

I am done trying. Lord, give me peace.